Gen 4: Chapter Nine

Even though I have woke up and made pancakes every day for the last sixteen years, today I felt different. I felt changed.
Charissa: Dameon? Honey, you're burning the waffles!
I look down but can't find the energy to care. Rissa walks over and shuts off the stove. I feel her arms slide around me and she leans her head on my back. But instead of being comforted, I feel chained. I shrug her off.
Dameon: I am going to get the kids up and ready for school.

Charissa: Good job, Aria! Didn't she do a great job, Daddy?
Yes, yes. The child peed in the stupid pot, let's have a party.
Dameon: Uh yea ... a great job.
Rissa shifted Selene to her other hip and watched as I pulled Aria's pull-up back into place.
Rissa: Are you working for tips today?
I can tell she wants to ask me to so something. I consider, for the first time in my life, lying to my wife.
Dameon: No. I have a gig tonight. Why?

Charissa: Do you think you could possibly start helping teach Aria a few words?
Rissa's face says she is expecting me to make up some excuse about why I can't. It annoys me!
Dameon: Yea, sure. Whatever.
Rissa storms off, Selene in tow. I plop myself on the floor and situate Aria in front of me. An hour later, Aria mumbles something resembling the word "cash". I begin to think I am in trouble.

Rissa is having some luck with Selene as well. What exactly she said, I am still left clueless about.
Dameon: I need to go. 
Charissa: Already? I thought your gig wasn't until 8pm.
I shuffle around a bit. I really just wanted some time to myself. How selfish that must seem to Rissa when she never gets a moment alone.
Dameon: I'll be back as soon as I can.
I lean in to kiss her but she turns her head so I only kiss her cheek. What is happening between us?

At the venue, I change into my show outfit then head to the private sitting room. My mind begins to explore scenarios of my accepting Chloe's invitation and maybe flirting it up with her. It leads me down a path of contemplating a divorce from Rissa.
Dameon: What am I doing?!
A stage hand pops his head up from a sound check at my sudden statement. I give him an awkward wave to let him know I wasn't talking to him.
  

Here I sit in this room, fantasizing about some woman I have only met once when the rest of the family is attending an awards ceremony for Juan's scouting achievements. I'm being stupid! Rissa is everything I could ever want in a woman and here I am shoving her away. I decide that after tonight's gig, I was going to make it up to her.

It was after eleven when I make it home. I quickly shower and shave, hoping to beat Rissa to the bed. But instead I find Juan passed out on my side. I lean down and kiss him on the forehead. I know he can't hear me but I whisper to him anyway.
Dameon: I'm real sorry for not being there tonight. But I am so super proud of you, Juan.
I let him stay there and turn to go find Rissa. I miss seeing the small smile that creeps onto his face.

I found her just finishing the girls bath. She averts her eyes when I walk in.
Dameon: Can I take one of those cute bundles off your hands?
Selene immediatley dives for my arms and I laugh as I swoop her up. Rissa silently passes through the bathroom door, ignoring me completely. We lay the girls down and take turns kissing them goodnight.

Rissa turns to leave but I step in her way. Placing my hands on either side of her face, I gently kiss her lips.
Dameon: I'm sorry.
I watch as tears start to form in her eyes. How could I have been such an ass?!
Dameon: I'm sorry for the way I have been acting towards you and the kids. This aging thing really did a number on me.
I went on to explain how I had been feeling and the terrible thoughts that had started to plague me.

Charissa: I appreciate you telling me. I was afraid there might have already been ... someone else.
Dameon: Never! Those thoughts were passing. I would never act on them. 
I accented each point with a firm kiss.

 Dameon: I love you so much. 
I pulled her close and deepened the kiss.

Dameon: I love my family and this life we have together. 
My hands are starting to travel under her shirt when she pulls back.
Charissa: Dameon! The girls. Let's head to our room.
I thought about Juan asleep in our bed.
Dameon: I have a better idea...

...

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Julio: I don't understand why this frapping thing keeps breaking! I have fixed it twice already.
Charissa: I don't know, Julio. But I do appreciate you fixing it again.
I lean against the counter listening to Rissa and Granddad moan about things breaking down. I tilt my coffee cup and sip. Things have gotten better between Rissa and I since that night of my last gig. I am earning more so I find I don't have to be gone as much. I push away from the counter and head towards the sound of the girls playing in the nursery.

Dameon: Come on, that a girl. Across the room we go, Leenie. Yay! Big girl. 
Selene is learning to walk now. Aria doesn't seem interested but she will get there eventually. I realize how much I was missing by working so much. The sense of hopelessness I was feeling before is still inside me. But I work against doing anything drastic. Instead, I have thrown all my energy into my family.

Rachel: Should I turn here?
This is my third "lesson" with Rach. I think she is learning to handle a car very well.
Dameon: No, keep going straight. We are going to try driving over some hills today.
I am still trying to bridge this space I feel between us. She will become a woman in her own right soon and after that, move off. It hurts to think of life without her.
Rachel: I invited some of my friends to the boys' party tomorrow night. Is that OK with you?
Dameon: Sure, that is actually pretty awesome.
Now I get a chance to see who she has been hanging out with.

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Rachel: Look at this, Maria! After only two sessions at the gym, I can already see a difference.

Maria: Well, you enjoy your pizza then. I know just smelling it will make be bloat. And I have worked too hard to get into my prom dress to ruin it now. By the way, do you think I could borrow those earrings of yours?

The party is in full swing and Maria is the only friend here with Rachel. I don't know why, but I am kind of relieved.

I wander around the family room, just absorbing these last moments of my boys as children.
Dameon: Gabe, don't you want to join the others?
Gabe: Nah. That racing game is pointless. I prefer something a little more challenging.
I shake my head. I wonder what kind of heir he will make when he is such a loner.
 

Juan: Booyah! I just spun you out, Shavonne!
Shavonne: Oh yea, well I am still going to kick your butt. I know a short cut.
Myles: Ugh! I can't keep this thing on the road. I think this game is stupid!
I laugh at the kids antics. I smile at Rissa as she rolls her eyes.
Charissa: I think Leenie needs a diaper change.
As Rissa heads upstairs, Leon waves at me from across the room.

Leon: Wanna play a game of eight ball?
Granddad's half sister (who is Leon's Mom) had moved to Lucky Palms with Leon in his High School years. He's back now visiting granddad after his mother paid to have herself staked. It was a sad bit of business but we try not to talk about it.

Dameon: You're on!
I reach under the pool table for some sticks. I hear someone enter and Rachel starts giggling.

I look over in time to see Seth Monroe hugging Rachel. My eyes zoom in on the familiar way he is rubbing her shoulder. I drop my pool stick and feel Leon pressing against my shoulder.

Leon: Calm down, Dameon.

I push his hand aside. Calm down? When that jack rabbit is taking advantage of my little sister? Hell No!

I give Seth a good shove and he looks at me with a surprised expression.
Dameon: Keep your damned hands OFF my little sister!
Rachel: Dameon! What are you doing?
Seth: Hey, Man, I was just telling her hello. I haven't seen her in a few days.
A few days?

Rachel: Seth is my BOYfriend. We have been seeing each other for weeks. Not that you would have noticed with all your moodiness.
Dameon: Rachel, he is too old for you and I will not allow you to continue seeing him. Consider your relationship over.
Rachel: You aren't my Father! I can do whatever the hell I want to. I'm almost 18, you know.
I slash my hand in the air to let her know to stop talking. I wasn't going to deal with her attitude right now. I turn back to Seth.

Dameon: And YOU! You are older than I am and have no business messing around with her.
Seth: She is a beautiful young woman. Why would I NOT be interested in her?
I lunge for Seth's throat as he puts his hands out to ward me off. Granddad appears out of no where and easily holds me back.
 Julio: Dameon, let this go. Your sons are about to enter teenage-hood.

I turn to see that during the ruckus, the boys felt that magnetic pull to their birthday cakes. All around me, I can see everyone cheering. The louder it gets the more sparkles that appear. I push my anger aside and try to focus on my sons.
Dameon: OK, Boys, let the magic flow!

Juan: You first, Gabe.
Gabe: Alright then. See you on the other side.
Juan laughs and starts to clap along to the Birthday song.

Gabe is the first to spin.

Gabe Montoya - Athletic, Loner, Workaholic, Brave

Then Juan spins.

Juan Montoya - Excitable, Light Sleeper, Clumsy, Slob


And so the magic ends and everyone begins to leave. I notice that Seth has slipped out during the celebrations and Rachel is in her room. This situation will have to be handled soon. But for now ... we eat cake!

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Dameon: Can't we just call the cops and say she ran away? They could bring her back, legally, right?
I watch Granddad as he pours me a drink. He shakes his head.
Julio: I think you have done enough.
Dameon: ME?! What did I do?
Granddad sets my drink down in from of me and leans close.
Julio: You all but dared her to leave with him. You tried to tell her what to do and, just like her father, she did the opposite. Give it time, Dameon.

I didn't want to give it time. Seth was bad news, I remember him from when he was with Holly. I didn't want my little sister to get hurt. I sip my drink and immediately start to choke and sputter.
Julio: Ah, I think I went a little strong with it. Next time, I should try to back off the hard stuff, eh?
I was still trying to catch my breath when I see that Granddad is staring into my eyes. I realize this drink experiment wasn't for him to practice but for me to learn.

I guess I would wait and see what happens with Rachel. I make a plan to go visit her in a week or so. I need her to know that I support her and ... well that she's not alone.